Proses Membangun Kesadaran Diri Melalui Latihan Meditasi yang Dilakukan Setiap Hari

Abstract

This study aims to understand how self-awareness develops through daily meditation practice. The focus is not on the length of time spent practicing, but on the qualitative changes in how a person experiences and lives their life. Although consistency is often considered important in meditation, the process of inner development that occurs through daily repetition has not been extensively explained from the perspective of direct experience. This study employs a qualitative approach with constructivist grounded theory method. Data were obtained from six meditation practitioners who had practiced every day for at least two years at the Vihara Loka Dhamma Cakka 3 meditation community, Jakarta. Data collection was conducted through repeated in-depth interviews lasting 60-90 minutes per session, analysis of practice journals, and observation of meditation sessions over a 24-month period. Data were analyzed using constant comparative method with open coding, axial coding, and selective coding techniques to build grounded theory. The results of analysis indicate that the development of self-awareness does not occur in a linear or straight gradual manner, but takes the form of a spiral movement. This process consists of three main phases: (1) habituation, when practice becomes an automatic habit; (2) disruption, when the practitioner faces a blind spot or a side of themselves previously unconscious; and (3) reconfiguration, a rearrangement of how one views and understands oneself. The key findings of this study suggest that daily practice serves as a safe "holding environment," allowing small moments of insight to accumulate and ultimately result in more fundamental changes in self-structure. This change is marked by a shift from merely "having consciousness" to "becoming consciousness" itself. In conclusion, self-awareness in meditation is not a fixed end goal, but rather something that continues to evolve from the relationship between the practitioner, the practice of meditation, and the context of everyday life. The practical implication is that daily practice should be understood not simply as discipline, but as a relational process that respects obstacles and difficult times as an important part of self-development.